‘The Wire’ is a Waste Of My Time And Yours
Let’s face it - all fiction is nonsense. The Wire, The Sopranos and even Shakespeare are all nothing but nonsense distracting us from real life.
How City W***ers Ruined Your Half-Time Pie
Your favourite chocolate bar is smaller, your football team is laden with debt and your beloved pie now tastes like it’s been rinsed in sewage. Blame the City, and it’s only going to get worse.
5 Bizarre Video Games That Time Forgot
Games are like movies - the more money you spend, the shitter they’re liable to become. Here’s a list of 5 crazy ideas for a game that time (and everyone else) forgot.
The Drones That Live Under The Sea
You think of drones and you think of flying things, buzzing around in the sky, taking impressive pictures, and firing missiles. But there’s another kind of drone; one that you don’t hear much about – underwater drones.
10 Ways To Make Video Games Great Again
A diet of sequels, gimmicky controllers and identikit first-person-shooters has left the video games industry reeling. This is how to fix it…
Top 5 Video Game Nasties That Time Forgot
Dodge arrows to rape and pillage a Native American village, plough your car through pensioners or just twat the screen as hard as you can. Video games - they don’t make ‘em like they used to.
Midnight Terror: The Story Of Welsh Vigilantes ‘The Scotch Cattle’
They patrolled the Welsh valleys in the early 19th century, reaping havoc in their response to unreasonable working demands. But who were the Scotch Cattle?
Cachau Bant: Mind Your Language
Angry about the 150 year crushing of his native Welsh language, the writer asks ‘How would you feel if you were made to speak German?’
5 Women From Video Games I Really Fancy
She’s a big blob of yellowness that manages to look sexy, and she’s not the only pixelated princess to get me hornier than a rutting weasel…
The 5 Greatest Performances In A Hoolie Movie
One of the most overlooked genres in film, the football hooligan romp has produced some of the most memorable film performances ever. Here’s the cream of the crop…
The 5 Football Video Games That Time Forgot
In an age of X-Box live and FIFA 11, it’s easy to forget about football’s computer game roots. Here we salute the genre’s evolution from 8-bit Jimmy Greaves to Game Boy David Beckham
Mercury Prize 2013: David Bowie Favourite, I Think He’s Rubbish
David Bowie’s comeback album has been nominated for the Mercury Prize, but is it just me who think he’s a bit naff?
Social Gaming - No Thanks
Why forced social interaction is destroying the quiet pleasures of gaming
Charlie Veitch Interviewed: From Banker To Britain’s Most Wanted Anarchist
Are you one of the growing number of people being made reduntant? You could start signing on, and get to work on your CV.. or you could go the other way and become the UK’s most talked about anarchist. That’s what Charlie Veitch did…
Is MySpace Back From the Dead?
It’s time to delete those embarrassing accounts from five years ago, because MySpace is back and it’s got a bit of Justin Timberlake all over it…
5 Of The Best News Apps For iPhones
There’s an app for everything, and you can practically brush your teeth with your iPhone, but which are the best for hard news?
10 Brilliant Songs That Go… La, La, La
Why bother knocking out meaningful lyrics when you can fill up a decent song with ‘La La la’s’. If you don’t like it take it up with Van, Iggy, Weller and Rod.
0x10c: The Insanely Ambitious New Game From The Genius Behind Minecraft
Markus Persson’s Minecraft was the indie gaming hit of the decade. His next project looks even more ambitious…
Wii U: A Distant Second To Your Mobile…For Now
The Nintendo Wii changed everything. Its follow-up has potential but for now you’re better off playing Angry Birds…
Derren Brown’s Ultimate Trick…
…is gaining acceptance as a man of science and not just another entertaining illusionist.
Don’t Believe In Derren Brown
Derren Brown wants to be seen as our scientific saviour - his shows position himself as a remarkable self-help guru. Speak to anyone who’s been on his show however, and you’ll see he’s nothing more than a good director of TV….
Wii U Reviewed: How Nintendo Are Turning Innovation Into Stagnation
Nintendo used to be the king of consoles, but with the Wii U their focus has firmly shifted from great gaming to gimmicky, hype-filled marketing. If you’re a serious gamer, then this console just isn’t for you.
The Wonders Of Wimbledon
You have to love a sports tournament which can send a superstar back to the changing rooms for wearing the wrong coloured shorts. Here’s what we love about Wimbledon…
E3 2012 And The Death Of Mainstream Gaming
40 years of game design and innovation has ended in a brown, bloody, shitty sludge where every game involves a tattooed hard-man crouching behind things and shooting people in the face…
The Hilarity of People Falling Into Water
Get two Brits in the vicinity of a large volume of water and it’s only a matter of time before one of them pushes the other in. But why do we find it so funny?
The Most Ridiculous Racehorse Names in History
Waikikamukau, DoReMiFaSaLaTiDo, The Wife Doesn’t Know and Don’t Tell The Wife - all genuine racehorse names. Here are some of the most hilarious…
Paying For The Toilet And Standing on The Plane: Budget Airline Getaways
It’s so hot here in England that you might as well stay put, as the hassle of the budget airline getaway is not always worth the flight…
Anders Breivik: Did Call Of Duty Really Influence The Norway Massacre?
The Anders Breivik trial enters its second day, but did a video game really influence last year’s Norwegian massacre?
Hans F Hansen: Scrotum Cream Salesman or The New Hugh Hefner
Famed in the Faroes for scoring against Scotland, the former international footballer now dreams of toppling the Playboy empire.
Football Manager 2012: Miles Jacobson Reveals Why It’s So Addictive
FM12 is launched today.Miles Jacobson, the man behind the world’s most addictive game talks about the new version, the stars who can’t get enough of his ‘glorified spreadsheet’ and the agents who desperately try to get their players stats boosted.
The iPhone App Conspiracy
They’re killing the web and destroying your soul. Discover the 5 reasons why this writer thinks you shouldn’t bother ever buying an app. (Apart from ours which will be out in a few weeks).
PES 2012 Reviewed: The Best Football Game Ever Created
Football tribalism is not just for the terraces, and the imminent release of Pro Evo Soccer 2012 is due to rile both PES fanatics and the FIFAphiles alike…
World Cup Rugby 2011 Reviewed
With the Rugby World Cup rumbling along in New Zealand here’s a look at whether it’s video game counterpart is worth £40 of your hard-earned cash…
What To Expect From FIFA 12
Football fans crave success. If we can’t get it in reality, then reality can p*ss off because we now have access to an alternate world where supporting a crap, shambolic and skint club is no barrier to success.
Undercover Boss, Week 5: PR Charade By Britain’s Worst Energy Supplier
Npower undercover boss Kev McCullough took the radical step of donning a red fleece and growing some stubble in an attempt to connect with his staff. Gripping stuff…
Le Tour de France 2011: Created By A Sandal Wearing Crank
Leave Call of Duty. Forget FIFA. If you want a unique gaming experience then the underground world of cycling simulators is where it’s at.
F1 2011 Previewed: Even Better Than The Real Thing
I’d prefer to swim with sharks that watch a Grand Prix, but F1 2011 is a belting game, and it means I won’t have to befriend Nige in accounts and start watching Top Gear…
Duke Nukem Forever: About As Entertaining as Bernard Manning
If puerile wisecracks, violence and misogyny are your thing, the return of Duke Nukem should be right up your alley.
Lords Of Football: The Game That Lets You Live The Playboy Players’ Dream
Plans may still be in the early stages, but could this Championship Manager versus The Sims mash up, where you get to recreate the world of these multi-millionaire fuckwits, be the ultimate football game?
LA Noire: The Detective Game That’s Not Much Cop
Rockstar Games, those clever folk behind Grand Theft Auto have just launched a new game which looks ace - like the movie LA Confidential. Unfortunately they forgot to make it any fun to play.
You Can’t Beat A Bit Of Bully, But That Doesn’t Make Darts A Sport
There’s nothing wrong with darts. If you’re in a pub and looking for something to do, other than get pissed; it’s an option. It beats folding up crisp packets into tiny triangles, and it’s cheaper than the trivia machine.
Top-Tips For Anti-Terrorists
From Frankenbombers and their bums to Al-Qaeda and beyond, it’s a veritable minefield out there. Be safe kids and read this guide to combating the terrorists