I'm Deserting The Toon Army. Join Me.

Alan Pardew is just the latest mug to be the public face of Mike Ashley's idiocy, which is why I won't be going to St James' Park until we have a new chairman.
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Alan Pardew is just the latest mug to be the public face of Mike Ashley's idiocy, which is why I won't be going to St James' Park until we have a new chairman.

So, Alan Pardew is the man with the experience Mike Ashley was looking for. He certainly knows his way to the dole office. But as a Premier League manager? I admire his bottle for taking the job, but I don’t hold out any hope.

This reminds me of the late 1970s. Back then coach Richard Dinnis (a PE teacher strictly speaking) had stumbled into the job as manager. The players liked him. The incompetent board, lead by Lord Westwood who knew nothing about football, didn’t. Dinnis was duly sacked and Bill McGarry was brought in as the experienced manager to take a hard line with the players. We were relegated.

The managerial merry-go-round has been spinning ever since, but looking at managers is a distraction. Forget managers. It wasn’t until the idiots in the boardroom were replaced that we actually got somewhere. With Sir John Hall in as chairman (and, crucially, a football man Freddie Fletcher as chief executive) things took off in the 1990s and we nearly won the league. Then Freddie Shepherd took over the boardroom and it’s been downhill ever since. Shepherd, who shafted Mike Ashley when he sold him the club, is supporting his fat cockney mark on the latest managerial appointment. Shepherd says ‘business is business’. He says perhaps he’d have done the same (sacked Hughton and appointed Pardew). He says it’s the fans duty to get behind the club’s new manager. Cheeky bastard. That’s taking the fans for granted. And what if we don’t? Court Martials for Toon Army deserters?

When Mike Ashley bought the club he bought 55,000 seats. He didn’t buy the arses that sit on them. And business is business in homes across Tyneside as well as in the boardroom at Gallowgate. Sometimes you have to make an unpopular decision for the long term good, like telling your 13 year old that we aren’t going to the match any more until the club has a new chairman.

It doesn’t matter what division we’ve sunk to, we’ll be back when he’s gone.

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