Royston Drenthe: Liverpool Should Read This Before Signing Everton's Real Madrid Loanee

Royston Drenthe: Liverpool Should Read This Before Signing Everton's Real Madrid Loanee
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Royston Drenthe: Liverpool Should Read This Before Signing Everton's Real Madrid Loanee

Royston Drenthe: Liverpool Should Read This Before Signing Everton's Real Madrid Loanee. They should be afraid, very afraid...

One of the more naturally gifted all-rounders in the modern game, Royston ‘Ricky’ Drenthe is a man you should be keeping a close eye on. Already a Bada*s by association (he is nephew to ex-Ajax, Juventus and Barcelona midfielder Edgar ‘The Pitbull’ Davids) Drenthe has time and again proved that he belongs in this column outright, not just because of his family. His career began modestly at Feyenoord, but took off after he appeared for the victorious Holland side at the 2007 u-21 European Championships and was named Player of the Tournament by UEFA. This secured him a 13m Euros move to Real Madrid; but only after Drenthe, in his first public display of being a Bad*ss, threatened to take Feyenoord to court if they did not let him leave.

Despite scoring a stunning goal on his debut against Sevilla, he failed to make much of an impact on the first team at Real. He more than made up for this off the pitch though; driving his car through the unfamiliar city of Madrid, Drenthe got lost and turned to his Satnav to direct him. And when it told him to turn left, he did so; taking absolutely no notice of the police car that was in his way and crashing straight into it. While he and his three passengers escaped unhurt, a policeman was taken to hospital to be treated for whiplash. Royston 1-0 The Police. He was then stopped at 4am doing 160km/h and having run 6 red lights, but escaped punishment after saying that he was rushing to hospital. 2-0.

By now well out of favour at Real, he spent the 2010/11 season on loan at newly-promoted Hercules. And while his time there started as a fairy tale, his free kick leading to the first of two unanswered goals in an astonishing win at Camp Nou, it soon turned to Greek tragedy as it emerged that the club couldn’t actually afford to pay the players as they had agreed; a problem rife in Spanish football that has led to a players strike and 2-week delay to the beginning of the 11/12 season. But while teammates including France international David Trezeguet bitched and moaned privately, Royston unleashed his innate Bad*ss and went on strike in December, heading to his home in Rotterdam for Christmas and threatening to return to Madrid if the situation wasn’t resolved. He said of the matter; “I know that the people will probably think I’m a difficult character, but I’m not doing anything wrong here. I haven’t been fully paid once since I left Madrid for Hercules. I’ve received 50 per cent of my monthly wages on two occasions and didn’t get paid at all in the other four months. I have a mortgage and several other bills that need to be paid.” And those other bills must have been fairly substantial.

When it emerged in May 2009 that he was nailing Malena Gracia, two-time Spanish Playboy Cover Girl, there was only one person who wasn’t impressed by the news, Drenthe’s wife, who was pregnant with their second child..

Because off the pitch, one of Royston’s greatest talents is his way with the ladies. While every respectable modern-day footballer bears a scar or two from the fake nails of a glamour model, this would never be enough for a true Badass and Drenthe put himself ahead of the curve by joining the select club of those who have ‘banged’ a Playboy bunny. But even this wasn’t enough for Royston. When it emerged in May 2009 that he was nailing Malena Gracia, two-time Spanish Playboy Cover Girl, there was only one person who wasn’t impressed by the news, Drenthe’s wife, who was pregnant with their second child. That’s right, Drenthe’s wife. This affair doesn’t even appear to be a one-off or a well-kept secret; when interviewed, Royston famously responded to the question, “How often do you have sex?” with the frankly unbelievable answer, “With my wife, you mean?”

When he’s not too busy romancing smoking-hot women, Drenthe spends much of his free time in pursuit of the arts with his blossoming gangsta rap career. In 2008, he featured on Dutch artist U-Niq’s track ‘Tak Takie’, alongside former Ajax and Liverpool starlet Ryan Babel no less, before correctly deciding that the more established rapper was clearly holding him back and cutting a record of his own in July entitled ‘Jemay-Lee’ after his daughter and second child. Yes, the second child with whom his wife was pregnant while he was smashing a Playboy model. Somewhat upsettingly, this fact doesn’t seem to be mentioned in the song, although it could just be this author’s limited Dutch that is to blame for misinterpretation.

At only 23 years of age, Drenthe has plenty of potential to become an ever bigger Bad*ss in the future. Only last year, he added another weapon to his ever-expanding arsenal by executing a perfectly-timed karate kick to LA Galaxy midfielder Juninho’s head, in a pre-season friendly no less. Attaboy, Royston.

This article first appeared on whateverhappendto...

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