Suárez Finished Like A Man Who Knew It Was Going To Be Disallowed

According to ESPN's commentary team, the Liverpool number seven's goal against Mansfield was reminiscent of Maradona's Hand Of God. Has the media's witch-hunt of the Uruguayan gone too far?
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According to ESPN's commentary team, the Liverpool number seven's goal against Mansfield was reminiscent of Maradona's Hand Of God. Has the media's witch-hunt of the Uruguayan gone too far?


Once again Liverpool's Luis Suarez has been exposed as the worst human being ever to walk the planet by an amateurish media determined that every story must have a villain.

For those who haven't been lucky enough to see the game (and I use lucky in the loosest possible sense, if you're a Liverpool fan you could say that we played well for 25 minutes then faded and put in a second half performance that was in no way good enough against a non league side however spirited their own performance was) Suarez scored our second goal, handling the ball immediately before putting it in the back of the net.

This prompted an outburst of utter bile from both commentator and expert analyst. - Chris Waddle, a man better remembered for a ungainly short back and mullet hairdo and an incredible piece of pop history when conjoined with Glenn Hoddle for the mystifyingly successful 'Diamond Lights'.

Suarez was, they declaimed, in a mix of venom and joy that they had something to blame for a premiership team defeating a non league team, a cheat. Nothing more nothing less. They admitted that 'these things happen in football' but that they have a tendency to happen 'when he's around'.

Taking away the fact that he's amongst the Premiership's leading scorers, that his first goal against Sunderland on Wednesday night came from the way that he remained on his feet when it would be easier to accept the free kick that would have been awarded or that  despite Luis' reputation for diving, there is only one player who has received a ban for being awarded 5 yellow cards for simulation (Hello Mr Bale) lets look at the actual incident.


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The ball is played through to Suarez, Suarez shoots, the ball ricochets back from the 'keeper, Suarez' hand is in the air, his hand forces the ball down, he puts the ball in the net. He is, say the ESPN gurus, a cheat. But look at his body language when he finally hits the ball, it's the finish of a man who knows that this isn't going to count and he's probably picking up a yellow into the bargain.

The officials miss all this (at normal speed we all miss all this, it's only the replays that incite the commentary team's disgust) the goal is given, Suarez accepts this and celebrates a 2-0 lead.

"Why" decry the angry mob of 2 "can't he hold his hands up and admit what he's done?"

At this point we have entered an alternate reality that has existed for no other player, no other team, no other sport at any point in modern history but one that our gallant shining knights of truth, honesty and the ESPN way have decided should apply at this very moment alone, refusing to accept the advantage that an official's mistake has given you.

Are we now to expect that every time Liverpool have had a blatant penalty denied, every time a clearly onside goal has been declared as offside by an incompetent official (and most of these have gone against Suarez) the opposing team will now step forward and say that they were wrong at the time and should have insisted that the goal/penalty/free kick should have been given, they are ashamed of themselves and will endeavour to be more honest in future.

Can we imagine the moment when a commentary team has the temerity to describe one of Sir Alex Ferguson's players as a cheat? When they stop insisting that a bad tackle by a midfielder with a career full of bad tackles is purely down to over enthusiasm and that he's "not that type of player"?

Of course we shouldn't, the roles have been handed out now and no matter how any player may not fit the typecasting, it's of no consequence, that is their part and they will play it for their career.

Luis Suarez is a cheat and a villain.

We know because the media has told us.

Follow Ian on Twitter: @fish2310