If you go to the store, could you pick up the following items:
1. Onions. Red onions. Red like the paintwork of that 1959 Lincoln Continental that I owned around 1981. That was a beautiful automobile, just used to shimmy down the freeway, my old dog Claude sitting there beside me. Claude was a great little hound, part beagle, part chow, part Eskimo I think. We’d head out in the Connie and park up at the edge of the prairie, me watching the wind, Claude looking out for rabbits. He loved rabbits. I love rabbits. I’d sit there, next to Claude, and think, ‘You know, songs are kind of like rabbits’. You got to be patient, let them come to you, don’t frighten them away. I remember being naked with Elvis and Nina Simone, smoking opium in Lahore and saying something similar… but back to the rabbits. Songs are like rabbits. In fact, songs are like a lot of small mammals. Hamsters, foxes, stoats, chipmunks, sloths, bats, gerbils, badgers, marmosets, voles, mice, Shetland ponies, rats, white rats, water rats, brown rats, black rats, small rats, big rats, beavers and prairie dogs. My old dog Claude loved the prairie. Me and Claude, we’d be out there, sometimes in the Connie, sometimes in my 1948 Buick Roadmaster, just Old Blue and I. Old Blue was another great dog I had. Part Husky, part the dog that Graham Nash used to own.
Used to hop straight into my 1956 Crown Victoria, and we’d head out into the canyon and just listen to the silence. And I thought, if only it was possible to attain the same clarity of sound with a commercial digital music device. It was then I started working on the SoundSource 5000 or the Soso as it will be known internationally. It is going to revolutionise the music industry. Never will music be heard with such precision. Once, John Lennon revealed to me the secrets of great songwriting… and you’ll be able to hear his songs and many others with perfectly reproduced cadence thanks to the SoundSource 5000 or the Soso, as it will be known globally. Because songs deserve respect, they are like rabbits. Rabbits deserve respect. You’ve got to tickle them just right. Tickle them, don’t scare them, because when I say rabbits, I mean songs. Songs are like rabbits. And they are also like shrews, meerkats, squirrels, bushbabys, otters, guinea pigs, hares, ferrets, moles, small cats, ocelots and most importantly, rabbits. My songs are like rabbits and they are also like my dogs insomuch as my dogs are like my children, with my children being like my cars and my cars, well, they remind me of my trucks. The best truck I ever owned was a 1969 Ford F-100 Ranger, sold to me by Jimi Hendrix just before he faked his own death. I loved that truck. Loved it like a child or a song or a dog. Skippy, a great old dog of mine, would hop in the back of the 1956 Chevy 3100 and I’d throw on my favourite plaid shirt. I loved that shirt. It had press-studs and the ‘pop’ they made when you buttoned it up was just remarkable. I thought ‘I wonder if there would ever be any sound technology that could reproduce the beautiful noise those press-studs made?’ Right there and then I started thinking about the SoundSource 5000, or the Soso as it will be regarded the world over. If only there could be a portable music device where my songs (which are like rabbits) could be heard in my cars, while wearing a plaid shirt and enjoyed by my dogs (who enjoy rabbits and songs, and songs which are like rabbits) and be perfect. Like a train. I recall the most important, life-changing advice I ever got from the great Bob Dylan himself. But I digress. I like trucks.