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Why Lie Kenny? All Leeds United Fans Need To Listen To This Song

by Sabotage
19 January 2012 13 Comments

All is not well at Leeds United and 'Bates Out' banners are brilliant, but sometimes a parody song can have a bit more impact...

The tide is turning against Ken Bates. He’s been accused for some time, by the Leeds United faithful, of turning Leeds into a selling club, and it appears that the pending departure of club captain Jonathan Howson could be the final straw. To step up their protests against the silver-haired despot, Leeds United blog ‘The Scratching Shed’ have teamed up with musician Mark Duffy to pen an ode to his duplicity.

The Scratching Shed’s founder and editor explains the construction of the song – ‘The idea for the song came about one sleep deprived night when my blood alcohol level was dangerously high. With The Pigeon Detectives blaring out in the background and Ken Bates rants flying around Twitter, somehow the two collided and I woke the next morning to see Mark Duffy had responded to a tweet I could barely recall offering to perform the lyrics I had no recollection of.  This is why drunken ideas should always go on Twitter.”

“Anyway, a dozen or so emails later and myself and Mark managed to complete the lyrics for the full song. That left Mark to record the song and me to mess around with some over-complicated video software I didn’t have the foggiest idea how to use. Only a few days later and here we are, ready to share our ‘Bates Out’ propaganda with the world.”

Mark Duffy Music

The Scratching Shed: Leeds United Rumours, News & Blog

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image descriptionCOMMENTS

Morten 12:42 pm, 19-Jan-2012

Nice one lads:) I really enjoyed that. Got the smile back on my face, for a while at least!

scrotumchops 12:45 pm, 19-Jan-2012

Bates is going nowhere because there are no big investors looking at championship clubs and if they were Bates would want too much 'future growth' capital in advance - he's a businessman. When he bought the club there was much talk of several investors after the club and not one of those actually submitted bids they just rode the free publicity. So if he decides to sell - who's going to buy at his price? Clearly he'll wait until the club is in the prem and the infrastructure is solid (not sure when that will be) Howson leaving Leeds is not down to Bates - it's down to Howson and his agent - Bates has said many times he will not break the wage structure for any player at this club.

DisasterBates 1:02 pm, 19-Jan-2012

Great video! After the anger comes the determination to get 'bad santa' out. Bates is simply a bad money manager - remember this is the man was days away from totally bankrupting Chelsea. Example, pay Howson [or Beckford, or Gradel, or Johnson, etc etc, its a long list] £20k a week, sign them on 3 year deal, then after year 1, if we arent promoted THEN sell them, and pocket far more in transfer fee [to cover extra wages too] than we do now - AND good players get you promoted!Simples! But hes senile, and rubbish at his job, AND he will leave. Those who say he wont dont know there history. No one likes the abuse, the pressure, the grief. Probelm is SG will go first [chairman under pressure always sack the manager], but if thats the price to get rid of the bad smell of last 7 years then so be it.

Henry 2:31 pm, 19-Jan-2012

Looks like Ross McCormack will be next out the door!! Who needs a goalscorer when you have a defence as good as ours???

Johnny L 9:14 pm, 19-Jan-2012

This could be the final straw. File with all the other final straws.

Gerry C 9:54 pm, 19-Jan-2012

We’ve seen it all before. The fire sales. The living the dream. Woodgate, Bowyer and even Smith, a local boy come good, all had to be sold off. We didn’t like it but we understood that we would have to take the pain. There were the excessive wages paid to below average Premiership players. £7M spent on Seth Johnson on wages of £42,000 per week when he would have happily settled for £15 grand a week. £4M on Michael Duberry, £12M on a half crocked Robbie Fowler, £7M on Darren Huckerby. The list goes on. We had something tangible to show for it. It wasn’t worth it but we had the great nights against Anderlecht, Lazio, Barcelona, Valencia and co to whet our appetite and linger on as memories. Later we had local nuggets, like James Milner and Aaron Lennon fresh off the Thorp Arch production line, players who weren’t quite the finished article but match winners with that something special to make it at the highest level of the game. Leeds got £3M for Milner. He was sold by Newcastle to Villa for £12M and a further £18M by Villa to Man City with £8M worth of Steven Ireland going the other way. No sell on clause. Aaron Lennon was sold to Spurs for £1M in 2005 and Spurs have already turned down bids of £17M for him. That was the old regime. What would they know about sell on clauses ? Krasner and Professor McKenzie were amateurs in the cut throat business of professional football in England. How thankful we were seven years ago when the greatest wily old rogue of them all stepped out of the shadows to save our football club, Kenneth Bates. The genius who bought Chelsea for £1 and sold it for £17M was going to resurrect Leeds United, one of the biggest sides in world football, and he was up for one final challenge. Initially we had to take more pain. Match tickets had to go up. Season tickets had to go up (now the fourth highest in England) and by the way you guys in the Supporters Clubs can piss off also, even if you were formed in 1919. Members clubs were formed at the tune of £45 per person. Leeds fans had to take more medicine to pacify our creditors, to pay back the debt and financial restructuring of Elland Road and Thorp Arch. Lovable Dennis Wise was appointed after Blackwell and duly managed to take Leeds into the third tier of English time for the first and hopefully only time. Of course Ken being Ken managed to piss off almost every Football league side in the three divisions and his fast track into receivership only managed to get Leeds docked 15 points before the season started. Two clubs voted for us, Leicester and Peterboro. Would you go to Milan Manderic and Barry Fry for a reference ? Crafty Ken succeeded in getting £4M for Taiwo, Woods and Rose who were poached from his beloved Chelsea and another £500K for Luke Garbutt who chose to further his fledgling career with Everton instead of Leeds United. This was to get Leeds trading “in the black”. McAllister failed at the Play-Off final and succeeded in losing to Histon in the FA Cup. Step forward Simon Grayson who had developed a decent reputation at Blackpool. There were great days (and wealthy koffer matches) notably Man United at Old Trafford, Arsenal and Spurs away in the cups until we limped across the line versus Bristol Rovers to gain promotion to the Championship. The cup matches at Old Trafford, Arsenal and Spurs away were thought to have earned Leeds £8M. Yet, still the austerity continued that would make Michael Noonan look like Father Christmas, unlike the old buzzard living in Monaco. Delph was allowed leave Leeds for £6M and a 28 year old Michael Dolye was employed from Coventry as his on loan replacement. Beckford was followed out the door by Johnson and Kilkenny, all deriding the offers of improved contracts as insulting . Freebie Paynter came in to replace Beckford. United finished a creditable 7th back in the Championship but many of Grayson’s rag tag bunch of freebies and loanees struggled to make the difference and Grayson struggled in matches tactically. The fans waited with anticipation for a pre-season of top notch arrivals to help make a concerted push in the 2011/12 season for promotion and back to the promised land of the Premiership. After all, Ken enjoyed proclaiming how profitable the club had become with it's 17 different forms of revenue all producing nicely for him. Schmeichel was forced out the door for £1.1M and on deadline day in August, United’s player of the year and top scorer Mad Maxie Gradel was sold to St Etienne because he “refused to sign a new contract” for £2.2M. Of course the player denied that any offer of a new contract was ever made. That was two years in a row that Leeds sold their highest goal scorer. Bates called the fans who protested as “morons” who failed to see the bigger picture of £7M worth of executive boxes in a half full East stand with a museum thrown in for good measure. More freebies and loanees were drafted in like Nunez, O’Dea, Forssell, Varynen, Lonergan, Rachubka and Keogh (to name but a few) and expected to keep Leeds in the top six. For a while all was rosy in the garden as McCormack scored with everything he touched whilst Snodgrass, Clayton, Lees, White and Howson produced the goods to keep United as a constant top six side. Suddenly the inspirational Lonergan broke a finger and Grayson went to his second stopper (the third choice keeper from Blackpool) to continue the good work. The back four did what they did best, concede goals but the goals up the other end started to dry up. United failed to beat Coventry and Blackpool put five past Leeds at home. Howson got injured, Larry struggled with his tactics and Snodgrass was hospitalised. United went into free fall and plunged to 11th after defeats to Barnsley (twice) Reading and Derby. Many fans called for Larry’s head but Bates gave him the dreaded vote of confidence whilst chastising him over a poor Christmas. Bates waxed lyrically : ‘if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen’.” “We have 17 cost/profit centres and everything is okay. We have 220 full-time staff, 700-800 part-time staff and I think we also employ half the police in West Yorkshire – or that is what it looks like when I see the bill coming in. “We do our budgets. I add up all the income, deduct all the expenditure, use it as a credit balance, take off a sum for contingencies and then say to the manager, ‘That’s how much we have to spend, wages and transfers”. Except the maths doesn’t add up and it never has. Leeds were linked all week with a move for former hero, Fabian Delph to rescue our season from Aston Villla, all the time hoping that Delph would arrived before Jonny Howson left. Even for Leeds fans so adept at losing our better players, this was a massive bolt out of the blue. Howson, the player every Leeds fan could identify with. A lad who would be in the Revie stand, watching, if he wasn’t a player. A lad who had said just two short months ago :" It's a dream come true just playing for the club, never mind captaining them, ( And on the subject of contract talks, he added): "I'm sure they'll be finalised and I'll sign soon". Leeds issued the usual tripe about not being prepared to lose a player in May for nothing, but really were more annoyed that it leaked out before Delph had arrived. I often disagree with Greg over Larry and his complicity in the whole thing, and we have our own opinions, but like Jonny Howson we are Leeds through and through just like all the other Louth SC members. Jonny was one of us. More than Smudger and Woody and Gary Kelly, Jonny was one of us. In 2008 when we travelled to Carlisle 1-0 down in the play-off semi final, it was Jonny who scored the two goals to get us to Wembley. In May 2009, 1-0 down at home to Bristol Rvs in the final game of the season, it was Jonny that came off the bench and scored that priceless equaliser. The lad would walk on broken glass to play for Leeds United and I accept that he wanted to play in the Premiership…..but he wanted it to be in a Leeds jersey. He has been driven out of Leeds. Howson has two sporting loves in life…..playing for Leeds United and fishing. Bates has thrown him into the river. I can live with Kilkenny, Schmeichel, Johnson and Gradel (Very reluctantly) leaving but not Jonny Howson. Now for the sad thing. Will the money be reinvested in our playing squad ? I believe that at least eight clubs in the Championship and probably ten have a bigger budgets than Leeds United. There will be no money from the Gradel, Schmeichel, Howson, and Kebbe deals, at least no tangible money. Budgets include wages and fees for players leaving and coming. So far £500K has gone out (Pugh) and possibly £6M is on its way in. Leeds United are only "disappointed" because the news leaked re Howson leaving before Delph arrived on loan to soften the blow with supporters. I suspected something was up last night when there was no Tuesday night show on LUTV. I'm disappointed and disgusted (but not surprised) for a variety of reasons. Disappointed - because Howson is a genuine footballer who loves Leeds United and is/was my favourite player. This is a player who could easily make the step up to the Premiership and I wish him well. Secondly if I hadn't Sean coming with me on Friday to the Ipswich game, I certainly would have stayed at home. Sickened and annoyed because this will have a huge impact on morale in the dressing room when the locally born Leeds captain is allowed leave over a few grand per week. White, Clayton, Snodgrass, Lees, McCormack etc will rightly question their future allegiance to Leeds with Snodgrass in particular who will be looking at the remaining 13 days of the window before moving to Stoke, Norwich, QPR, Wigan or wherever. For Jesus sake we've got a lucky bag bunch of castoffs from TNS, South Africa Meltdowns, and Yanks trying to fill Jonny's shoes and Max Gradel’s also. Whatever you think of Grayson, and I can understand many people wanting him to go also. Do you really think it would be any better if Grayson resigned and Bates employed someone else under the same constraints and regime (and willing to work for football's biggest tyrant) to manage Leeds United ? Remember we've had Eddie Gray, Kevin Blackwell, Dennis Wise, Gary McAllister and Larry - not a great track record is it ? Will I stop going to Leeds ? No and neither will probably the majority of members reading this. But then again neither of us would be surprised if at 9PM on Tuesday 31st of January, Sky Sports show pictures of Robert Snodgrass walking through the gates of the Britannia proclaimed as Stoke's (or some other PL's) new signing. Until Bates goes there will be no future for Leeds United. No ambition ! No pride in the club ! Seven years of misery is enough for any fan and it's Bates who churns around the pit of my stomach with a stench of putrid bile that is the attention of my fury. Having thought about it over the past few hours, I do think that this will be a bigger problem for Ken Bates than he can possibly have imagined. He may languish in his tax exile in Monte Carlo for a number of weeks and criticise all and sundry through his propaganda £4 programme notes, but his footfall to Elland Road will suffer and I suspect a relatively tolerant crowd to him thus far will turn and it will get nasty, especially if results continue to deteriorate. Is he the man we want to chair our football club with his foul mouthed rants and Father Jack like behaviour ? He has turned Leeds United into a comic feeder club, ambitionless, and has fed off our glorious name, whilst throwing a few crumbs to the masses....crumbs of reject nomadic trialists. Anything will do as long he can make a fast buck But wouldn't it be nice if the quietly spoken ex Leeds captain was to be the one who had the last laugh. Best of luck Jonny, I'm sure you'll do well for the Canaries, and no doubt Delia will be easier and nicer to work for than Kenneth Bates." Sickened and Disgusted but will still be Leeds when that 80 year old vulture is gone". Gerard Cunningham Dundalk.

leeds lee's 10:23 pm, 19-Jan-2012

Ive said it on a previous post on james browns article...i'll say it again...all the players to which you mention as ones that should have stayed and secured promotion...wanted to leave!!!! they are like me and you...double your money and youre off...basic economics...talk about blinkered views....i sat and watched the last barnsley game at oakwell....5 minutes in what happened..our negative fans were chanting bates out!..incredible....but its understandable...lemmings are lemmings and follow suit admirably for the easiest target who comes with chelsea history...and there lies part of the problem.....the bad blood between those 2 sides....... About time the 11 players on the pitch and possibly SG took some of the can for the recent poor showings....strict wage policy is how football should be these days when you havent got pots of money but I'd go further and dock wages if a player does not run at least 10 miles a game...bring back lee bowyer, the most tireless player ive ever seen.

Bluesman 10:53 pm, 19-Jan-2012

You cannot get away from the fact that Bates has allowed his directors to sell the best players and recruit mediocre. If anyone like Clayton turns out to be half decent they will take the money. How can you have amibtion. When Howson and Lees and Cormack and Clayton and a few more go Leeds will need a completely new team. They may find some more half decent players to sell on after that, but what about the clubs ambition to return to the premiership, what about the fans who sacrifice their hard earned money (Bates wouldn't know what hard work is)week after week. Where does the money go Kenny and why has Grayson bought so many fringe players who don't even make the first team. God help all Leeds United supporters

Glenn Cass 2:20 am, 20-Jan-2012

I cannot believe just how blind some Leeds fans are. Howson apart from a couple of games he has been crap and if we can get 2 million and get Delph back who is a much better player then Howson lets go for it and lets not forget one thing if Johny Howson loves Leeds so much and cannot believe he plays for is dream team he supported as a boy why is he leaving ! Its because he's got greedy and he cannot take the pressure for the poor team displays which he is the captain of a captain leaving a sinking ship. Im so mad that once again a player will not sigh a new contract and holds the club to ransom so we all turn on Bates. Howson leaves the club in the shit which he has played apart all season or have I got it all wrong I dont think so. Glenn Leeds till I die.

scrotumchops 2:52 am, 20-Jan-2012

You can't keep a player that's on a freebie in 6 months time from his dream of playing premiership football, a club that can give him that dream and higher wages over a Championship club. I say that because I think it will happen to Snodgrass, if he gets an offer from a Prem club with higher wages do you think he'll stay? According to Matteo he reckons Howson would have gone in the summer anyway leaving Leeds with nothing, if that's true then that 2million quid looks like good business to me albeit sad to see Howson go (a great team is built around a grat captain - but Leeds are far from a great team right now.) MOT.

scrotumchops 2:59 am, 20-Jan-2012

We know McCormack, Clayton and Becchio are the next targets for bigger clubs, you can bet Snodgrass is being eyed up too, once again offer any player in the lower leagues premiership football and most if not all will take it - accept it that there is no loyalty in football and contracts mean nothing. And if Leeds get offered silly money for any player they have said they will listen to offers - sadly instead of keeping the cream and winning promotion our way.

Gerard Cunningham 7:45 pm, 20-Jan-2012

Glenn ~ it's not a case of being blind. Yet another quality player wasn't paid his wage market value, which follows Gradel, Beckford and whether you rate them or not - Johnson and Kilkenny one of which is plying his trade successfully in the Premiership. In Bates programme notes tomorrow he states that the playing budget has gone from £9.5m to £11.7M and et the Gradel money and the Schmeichel money and the Howson money goes back into the transfer fund which leaves us around £3.2M shy - and then in the following page he has spent "approximately £20m on the East Stand. Surely you spend on assets what you can afford and that's after you put a team on the pack that can win promotion. Howson wasn't greedy. he was let down by his home town club and forced not a corner. Bates was more annoyed by the leak than the fact that his well respected attain s leaving. For the record like Aaron Lennon and Milner before him we will find that £2M is pittance fr a player of hs quality a act further hammered home by the quantity of points achieved since his injury.

Leedslad 4:45 pm, 1-Feb-2012

Leeds Lees , head in the sand or what ? I remind you of Edmund Burkes famous quote. "All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing"

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