I Sell Butt Plugs To Strangers

It's funny how quickly you get used to talking to strangers about butt-plugs, crotchless panties and the merits of lube...
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It's funny how quickly you get used to talking to strangers about butt-plugs, crotchless panties and the merits of lube...

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Talking with complete strangers about sex and advising them on the use of sex toys, lubricants, BDSM & Fetish gear, libido-enhancing oils and gels, porn films... In an environment where temptation is all around, where shiny fallic-shaped objects and lush lingerie draw people in, seducing them to step inside their own erotic fantasy world. This is what I do for a living; I sell products that promise sexual pleasure. And if I can break taboos and help people overcome their shame as I go along, then that is a nice bonus.

You see, I'm good at sales. It happens quite often that people come in to buy condoms or lube, but end up leaving the shop with a bag full of toys and lingerie because of my enthusiastic sales pitch. It's a shop; unromantically, a profit needs to be made and the sex industry is big business. But I'm an idealist as well as a salesperson.

In my profession, I meet a lot of girls and women who aren't comfortable about their own sexuality, which causes them to feel ashamed about wanting to buy a vibrator. Even in this day and age, simply pursuing pleasure and satisfaction holds a high threshold for many people, especially women. Sometimes I feel I am on a mission and that there is a lot of work to be done.

So who visits an Amsterdam Erotic Shop, besides hoards of tourists from all over the world? The shop I work in is considered to be classy. Our clientele are mainly women and couples, or men buying their partners a gift. Our Dutch customers can be locals, or people a daytrip to Amsterdam, who don't want to go to a sex shop in their hometown for fear of being seen by someone they know. There is that taboo again, and the shame.

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When I first started to work at the shop, there was a lot still to learn. I knew porn, vibrators and BDSM gear, but was clueless about lubes, toys for men, and libido-enhancing products. My boss taught me a good way to test the effect of vibration is to place a vibrator against the tip of your nose. Curious as I am, I researched the why, and found out this is because there are many nerve endings in that area, which makes it similar to the magic button aka the clit. Always good to know your facts, because most people think I'm joking when I tell them to put a vibrator against their noses. The boss told me to boost my product knowledge by opening up the boxes and putting batteries into the vibrators, to become familiar with the different vibrations and materials.

After working alongside a colleague for about a week, the day came when I had the place to myself. Needless to say, I spent most of my 11 hour shift touching vibrators and feeling up dildos, reading porn mags and checking out the DVD collection. Oh, and selling things, that too. At the end of the day, I was knackered, my nose felt as if it was buzzing, I had a list of things I wanted to buy and had gained a new-found fascination for the really bad amateur photos in the personals section of porn mags.

The shop opens at ten in the morning and when I open the front door to the public, I never know what to expect because no day is ever the same in that crazy place. Of course there are days when business is slow and all you can do is keep the place clean and read the newspaper, but it can all change within seconds. Before I know it, I'm helping a girl stuff her boobs into a corset in the fitting room, am explaining to a group of women where the G-spot is located and which toy to use to stimulate, or advising a man on which porn film to buy that his wife will enjoy as well.

I sometimes joke I'm jaded. Nothing shocks me any more. Huge double dongs, tranny porn, high-tech masturbation cups for men, arse cleansers, all the things that cause the majority of vistitors to giggle and blush, they've become a normal to me. There are moments I forget that others feel awkward when I speak openly and freely about sex, vaginas, penises and orgasms. Or butt plugs and strap-ons. There are also moments when I'm well aware I'm shocking the hell out of people, but I enjoy poking at their boundaries. And if they let me, I'll help them cross those boundaries and explore new ways to find pleasure, one butt plug at a time.