Dear Mr. Ronaldinho, Please Come To The Premier League

I mean, he's definitely a bit porky and nowhere near as good as he was but a man can dream, right?
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Former Barcelona and Brazil midfielder Ronaldinho finds himself a free agent (read: unemployed) after his release from Brazilian club Atletico Mineiro.

The 34-year-old former Balon d'Or winner is now on the hunt for a new club and I'm, as I'm sure the rest of you are, hoping the buck-toothed Brazilian sees out his remaining years in the Premier League.

However, with Bolton and Blackburn no longer Premier League outfits, there aren't many other clubs that simply sign players on reputation and for shirt sales. Surely someone will give Ronny a chance, though, yeah?

Clearly he's not the World Class play-maker we all witnessed make David Seaman look like a prick in 2002 - which would put the top six out of the window - but what about the likes of Manchester United (lol), Everton, Newcastle or maybe even Southampton? Who are clearly in need of someone - or anyone for that matter - surely they'll gamble on the former best player in the world, no?

In all honesty, I'm essentially writing this article out of hope, hope that instead of wasting his last remaining years of football rotting in Major League Soccer with Lampard and Villa, he gives the Premier League a crack and (cliché time) experiences Stoke City away on a cold, wet and windy Tuesday night, as Ryan Shawcross slams another mistimed tackle through the back of his hamstrings.

Follow Tayler on Twitter, @TaylerWillson