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16:56 A fittingly dramatic end to first day of womens boxing at the Olympics. A bravura performance from Mary Kom was the highlight, followed closely by the nation's sweetheart Natasha Jonas delivering on the big stage. With Nicola Adams, Savannah Marshall and the majestic Katie Taylor to come- it's only going to get better,
16:51 Edith Ogoke shocks the world with a 14-12 upset. The Excel erupts as the world silver medalist bites the dust.
16:51 Vystropova for me
16:50 The crowd going nuts for Edith. Everyone loves a slugger.
16:49 Whatever the outcome, the underdog has walked the walk and backed up her mouth.
16:46 Vystopova shows her class- pulling it back to 10-11. The Azeri looks favourite to out do the flagging Edith, but the bombs are still being thrown.
16:43 Ogoke throwing clubbing left and leads from the southpaw stance. Vystropova looks rattled and the lead grows to 8-4. The next two rounds promise to be epic as the defence minded Azeri must come forward to make up the deficit.
16:41 Ogoke's pressure rewarded with a 4-2 lead.
16:40 The Nigerian throwing agricultural shots with bad intentions. The crowd love it.
16:38 Ogoke has the chance to back up the big talk. I fear the worst for her in this company.
16:37 Elena VYSTROPOVA (Azerbaijan) v Edith OGOKE (Nigeria). Vystropova was edged out in the world championship final by Savannah Marshall. Ogoke has been talking big this week and threatening to mess up her opponent. Expect the Azeri to take her to school.
16:33 Feitosa piled it on at the death and pushed Li back. The Chinese fighter tucked up and weathered the storm to take it 19-14. Made a top class lass look ordinary and must be a real threat to Savannah Marshall.
16:32 Lovely potshotting on the backfoot from Li.
16:29 13-7 Li. Great feet for a big lass.
16:28 The Brazilian training camps must be crazy. All these girls just want to plant their feet and throwdown
16:26 Nice movement from Li punctuated with some stinging shots. 8-5 up on a quality opponent and looking a real contender.
16:23 4-2 Li after a feeling out round
16:20 Lame crowd pleaser Song 2 greets Roseli FEITOSA (Brazil) and Jinzi LI (China). Feitosa was the gold winner at the 2010 worlds in the 81 kg class, beating the Kazakh Volnova in the final.
16:18 Game as hell showing from NLFR- taking plenty to get her own shots off. Even the skirt looked OK really. A brave effort but Laurell hangs in there and triumphs 24-17. Another cracking fight.
16:13 Flashes of inspiration from NLFR but Laurell is putting on the Klitschko style grind.17-12
16:09 Laurell fighting big and fighting smart. Showing her experience and builiding up a 10-7 lead.
16:07 4-4 after one. The size difference makes it resemble Rocky 4 with the Swede in the Drago role. NLFR showed impressive speed.
16:05 Name thief is wearing a skirt.
16:04 Hearing Let Me Entertain You has soured my mood.
16:03 Anna LAURELL (Sweden) v Naomi-Lee FISCHER-RASMUSSEN (Australia) The Aussie is a rare example of the double, double-barrelled name and is therefore an egotistical time waster. Hobbies are riding her dirt bike and exercising her dogs and exercising her dogs- two more things sure to piss off right thinking humans. Laurell is a Swedish veteran and two time world champion. Like many Scandis, she is a swot with a PHD. She leaves her lead hand hanging out and is a sucker for a counter right hand over the top, but should be too smart and tough for a name hog like NLFR.
16:01 20-11 to Volnova.
16:00 Volnova found a reverse gear and looked after her lead. These are two hard bastards and nobody will relish a match with the Kazakh in the tournament.
15:57 17-8 Volnova. Nothing flash here. Just two boxers standing in front of each other throwing hard punches.
15:54 These lasses are throwing some seriously meaty shots. Volnova stretches the lead to 11-6.
15:51 6-3 to the Kazakh after one. Two big units in there. Andiego did her best work on the inside- possibly out of sight of the judges.
15:48 Marina VOLNOVA (Kazakhstan) v Elizabeth ANDIEGO (Kenya). Volnova won silver at the 2010 worlds up at 81 kg. British world champ Savannah Marshall awaits the winner of this one in the next round.
15:46 Time for the Middleweights 165 lbs or 11 stone 11 pounds. Team GB have the world gold medalist in this division: Hartlepool's Savannah Marshall.
15:44 Pritchard wins. Deserved, but the 15-10 looks a little generous to me.
15:42 The ref ignores a blatant knockdown by Rim. Poor officiating is universal.
15:40 Rim loses two points for not listening to the ref. Pritchard now three points up 11-8. She has decent footwork but her lack of a jab puts her in places she'd rather not be.
15;36 Rim looks to have been tutored at the Parachute Regiment school of milling. She leads 7-6. Pritchard seems to have the tools to win, but Rim his dragging her into a brawl on her terms.
15:34 The Tunisian has certainly come to fight, but the showy counters of the New Zealander have caught the judges' eyes 4-3
15:32 Rim getting past the jab and scoring early. I reall hope she fights as The Rimshot
15:31 They come out to Walk this Way- a song that is on the mens' rotation and therefore gives us hope that Kick Out the Jams may get an airing later.
15:30 Alexis PRITCHARD (New Zealand) v Rim JOUINI (Tunisia) The official 2012 website lists Pritchard’s occupation as baker, physiotherapist- which sounds unlikely. She is married to the senior national coach Cameron Todd and I’m sure you will all jump to the same conclusions I did now you are aware of that. Rim got gubbed by Katie Taylor in the worlds- but that happens to everyone.
15:28 16-14 to the Brazilian. Sometimes being a tough motherfucker is enough.
15:26 The relentless march of Araujo paid off. She caught up with her foe, let her have it and it was all over for Khassenova, but will the penalty hurt her?
15:25 Araujo unloads during a break for a standing count and is penalised 2 points.
15:22 Araujo goes 10-9 up after a much better round. All to play for in the final stanza.
15:18 To use a Brazilian MMA analogy- Araujo is like Wanderlei Silva: a come forward macho mama. Unfortunatley for her, the smart footwork and effective counters of the Kazakh aren't giving her a look in. For me- the 7-6 score is not wide enough in Khassenova's favour.
15:16 Posh nosh is nice but you can't beat meat and spuds. Basic one twos find the mark to give the Kazakh a 3-2 lead.
15:14 Adriana ARAUJO (Brazil) vSaida KHASSENOVA (Kazakhstan). As an MMA guy, I’m excited as Araujo has history with Luis Dorea- a coach who has worked with every legendary Brazilian MMA fighter you can think of. Anderson Silva, the Nog’s, Cigano, Machida- the lot. Expect idiosyncratic extreme violence to match the cool tattoos. Saida’s hobbies are dancing and going to the cinema with friends.
15:13 Independent Women by Destiny's Child- too obvious methinks.
15:10 Hard to criticise someone playing to their strengths- but that was dull. Dong wins 10-5.
15:08 Dong does nothing flashy but uses her reach well and dictates the pace.
15:06 Dong on song and walking it. 7-4 and, barring a disaster, sure of a last eight spot.
15:05 I hope that the achievements of Natasha Jonas aren't lost among all the athletics and tennis hysteria. She is a fine sports woman and a real role model.
15:04 Dong too long and too clever: 5-1 up and cruising. Not Iron Mike style but effective. Giving us all a breather after the heroics on both sides in the last fight.
14:59 3-0 to Dong. Easy.
14:57 Mihaela LACATUS (Romania) v Cheng DONG (China) Vastly experienced Dong’s hero is Mike Tyson. Expect her to make short work of Lacatus.- The inner will face nineteen year old Chorieva Mavzuna of Tajikistan- the youngest boxer in the competition. She told a BBC film crew that she used to cut her hair short and dress up as a boy in order to box competitively. Now she trains with the national squad and is still the only girl, but got to world final this year- inevitably losing to Katie Taylor.
14:56 I Like the Way You Move. Jesus- this crap makes you miss We Will Rock You- nearly.
14;54 21-13. Tasha's reward- a quarter final bout against Katie Taylor- the greatest of all time and as likely to take gold as Celtic are to win the SPL.
14:52 Underwood takes a standing count after a mean bodyshot. Tasha wins- a beautiful performance in a cracker. If the British public don't embrace this girl- they don't deserve to live in the country that invented Tizer
14:51 Queen looking for the Hail Mary
14:49 Superb stuff from Tasha. Silk and venom move her to a 13-9 advantage.
14:48 Underwood looking desperate- leaning in. If Jonas stays calm- this is in the bag.
14:47 Jonas now a point up 7-6. Brains winning out.
14:45 Much better from Tasha. Keeping the distance and deterring Underwood with some sharp punches
14:43 Boos ring out as 4-3 Queen is announced. The right hand over the top is the key to success for Tasha.
14:42 Fever pitch in the arena. Tasha has to keep her head.
14:41 Queen is a fixture on US chat shows due to her inspirational story of overcoming sexual abuse through boxing and membership of the pipefitter's union. Tash was the narrator and star of the ace Knouckout Scouser docu. Queen is go ahead with a bingo right hook. Tasha trades in sliky,in and out artistry and beat Underwood in the test event last November.Underwood is an inspirational person but a shit rapper (see Youtube for horrific evidence)
14:40 Lenny Kravitz annouces the entry of Quanitta ‘Queen’UNDERWOOD (USA) and Natasha JONAS (Great Britain). Former Liverpool Ladies player Tasha is wearing Everton blue.
14:38 Time for the Lightweights: 60kg, 132 pounds or 9 stone 6lbs
14:37 23-11 Petrova
14:36 A standing count and it's all over for Fernandes. Thoughts turning to the next bout Natasha Jonas v Queen Underwood.
14:34 16-9 Fernandes pushing the pace but Petrova is just too cute.
14:30 London 2012 has been the year of the southpaw. Petrova now 9-5 up. Fernandes finding the target with some nice body shots- a tactic that will get you nowhere in amateur boxing.
14:27 Petrova 5-2 up. Fernandes needs to be first if she's going to get anywhere in this bout.
14:24 Not sure about the new entrance songs for the women. Billie Jean this time. If they have done away with Queen I'll be happy. The Specials once said: if you have a racist friend, the friendship has to end. With me- it's a liking for Queen that's the deal breaker.
14:24 Stoyka PETROVA (Bulgaria) versus Siona FERNANDES (New Zealand) Fernandes has a masters degree in Psychology and a background in classical Indian dancing. Keep your eyes on this one as the winner will meet Nicola Adams in the quarter finals.
14:22 19-14 Kom. The crowd go wild. Are you watching Amir Khan and Frank Warren. Women can box and the people love it.
14: A bravura perfomance from Mary Kom, but she had to take some licks on the way.
14:17 Anyone who doubted whether women's boxing should be in the Olympics should kill themselves immediately. 15-10 An epic bout with Kom rolling back the years. Brilliant.
14:14 Kom 8-7 up. I feel she's getting the benefit of 'home' support. Superb show of skill and bravery, but can she keep it up against the bigger lass.
14:13 The size difference is the difference. The IOC's cowardice in deciding to only try 3 weight divisions exposed.
14:1 Kom the superior boxer, but the Pole is ominously marching forward. 3-3 and I fear that the Pole is only going to make it harder.
14:05 Prepare to behold a legend. Karolina MICHALCZUK (Poland) versus Chungneijang Mery Kom HMANGTE (India). The Indian is better known by the far cooler handle MC Mary Kom. Five times world champion and undoubted superstar of lady pugilism, but her success has come at 45 kg. She’s boxing at 13 lbs above her regular weight- a massive chunk for anyone. For a Flyweight- forget about it. The Pole has won a world title at 54 kg and has fought as high as 57 kg. A good big un beats a good little un surely.
14:04 15-14 Magliocco. Tight but right.
14:02 After some bullshit reffing (Andy Gray and Keysy will have enjoyed that) Magliocco came out shooting- rocking the Brazilian's head back a few times. Enough to take it for me.
13:58 Magilocco boxes like a Mexican. Matos looks great for an instant then seems to lose interest. Boosted by a holding penalty, Magliocco now 9-8 up. All to play for in the last round.
13:55 The crowd getting into this one. Matos 5-4 up.
13:51 Rangey southpaw Matos is getting hit far too easily. Magliocco is cutting off the ring and landing. I thought she was worth more than the point advantage the judges gave her. 3-2.
13:47 Ring walk tune: Put Your Hands Up by that TFI Friday band who sounds like he's having a difficult shit.
13:46 Next up: Erica MATOS (Brazil) versus Karlha MAGLIOCCO (Venzuela). On paper, neither of this pair look likely to end up on the podium. Wild card Matos is the lowest ranked boxer in the draw (22nd). The Venezuelan was outclassed by Nicola Adams at the worlds.
13:45 Kim gave it her best, but her opponent was simply too smart for her. The Russian gets the verdict: 12-9
13:41 Kim's chances are looking as bright as those of her nation's space programme. (Trev just called to help me out)
13:39 The Russian's switch hitting and use of the Mayweather stye Michigan check hook are bamboozling Kim. 9-6 Russia.
13:37 Kim's straight ahead approach is not getting her anywhere. 6-4 Russia. If I was Trevor Nelson, I could probably think of a subtle political metaphor.
13:34 A scrappy opening round with the Russian back pedalling and looking for a way round Kim's high guard. 3-2 to Elena.
13:30 Change to the entrance tunes from the men. The fighters enter to Only Girl in the World by Rhianna
13: 28 The historic first fight is Elena SAVELYEVA (Russia) v Hye Song KIM (North Korea) The Russian lost out to Britain’s Nicola Adams at the world championships. On the 2012 site, her hobbies are listed as: “cross-stitching, reading books, meeting friends, listening to classical music, playing the guitar, singing, shopping.” Meeting friends is either code for something well seedy or a sign of ultra-lameness.
If you Google the Korean’s name you get this Wiki entry: Song Hye-rim , (January 24, 1937 - May 18, 2002) was a North Korean actress and one-time favored mistress of Kim Jong-il I’m pretty sure this is not the same dame.
Boxing was one of the sports at the Ancient Greek Olympic games. At last, after waiting a few thousand years, it's time for the women to pull on the gloves and slug it out.
The women box 4 x 2 minute rounds rather than the three threes the men do; otherwise it's the same game.
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