QPR Greatest XI v Everton Greatest XI: Who Wins?

Sparky's QPR host Moyes' Everton at Loftus Road this afternoon, with QPR looking to pick up some much needed points - but who would win in a tie between their greatest ever line ups?
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Sparky's QPR host Moyes' Everton at Loftus Road this afternoon, with QPR looking to pick up some much needed points - but who would win in a tie between their greatest ever line ups?

QPR’s Greatest XI

GK – David Seaman
Purists might argue the case for Reg Allen or Phil Parkes but all things considered it has to be Spunky, if for no other reason than he never sported that ridiculous ponytail while playing for the hoops. Began his England career while at Loftus Road and coped admirably with the plastic pitch. 9

LB – Ian Gillard
The first member (there’ll be a few) of the legendary 75/76 team in the list, Gillard made the left-back position his own between 1968 – 82 and was part of the cracking full-back partnership with Dave Clement. Solid, dependable and good in a skirmish.7

CB – Alan McDonald
The Northern Irishman played over 400 games for the hoops and was part of the 1993 side that finished fifth in the Premier League (and unfortunately also the one that got relegated in 1996). A stopper rather than a ball-playing defender, he also got 52 caps for his country. 7

CB – Paul Parker
Despite having the passing range of a toaster, Parker was a good centre-half for QPR and quickly became popular due to his all-action style and the way he used his pace to make up for being shorter than an English summer. 8

RB – Dave Clement
A tragic tale. Made 472 appearances for QPR and played for England five times in 1976/77 and was a corking right-back who loved to get forward. Aged 34 after suffering a broken leg playing for Wimbledon, he became depressed at what he thought was the end of his career and poisoned himself with weedkiller. His son, Neil Clement, played nearly 300 games for West Brom. 8

RW – Dave Thomas

A classic winger full of pace and trickery, he should have received more than the 8 England caps that he got . Signed from Burnley for a then Second Division record of £165,000, he was one of the stats of the 75/76 side and when he was at Everton his assists helped Bob Latchford to 30 in a season. 9

CM – Gerry Francis
It’s a good job Gerry was good at football because with a face like his he’d have to work underground. Another player who won all of his England caps while at QPR (12, in 8 he was captain) and gets the armband. 9

CM – Stan Bowles
Stan might be a seven or even an eight over the course of his career but for QPR he was a ten, and not just because he happily accepted Marsh’s old Number 10 shirt on his arrival. Life chairman of the QPR Loyal Supporters Chairman and a maverick who told Jon Wilde that “I’d spliff up once in a while but that’s f*** all, innit? Everyone enjoys a spliff once in a while. Makes you nice and relaxed”. 10

LW – Trevor Sinclair
Close run thing here between Sinton and Trev on the left but despite Sinton scoring more goals for the club, Sinclair scored that overhead kick and anyone who can give you goosebumps deserves to be in. 7

CF – Rodney Marsh
It’s probably a good thing that him and Bowles never played in the same side but on a good day it would’ve been beautiful. Played all his best football in the hoops, scored 44 in 53 in his first season to help win the ‘double’ of Third Division and League Cup. Now tweets about his breakfast from Florida. 10

CF – Les Ferdinand
Notched over 20 goals in two separate seasons after being farmed out to Beskitas and Brentford and was the spearhead of Gerry Francis’ entertainers. He might have been forced out of Newcastle by Shearer’s ego but at QPR he is a legend. 9

Player – Manager – Gerry Francis
Made QPR a good Premier League side who played great football without an influx of millions. 9

Total: 102

Rock solid, rock hard and fond of unorthodox refuelling methods, Watson was superb. Lifted the FA Cup as captain in 1995 and once ruffled Michael Owen’s hair when the little swine was whining.

Everton Greatest Xl by Biff Bifferson

GK: Neville Southall

First up these are only players I’ve seen but even so the magnificent, contrary, scruffbag, maestro would be in any all time ace Everton list. Has there ever been a player so good yet so completely at odds with his status? Considered by many to be the best in the world in the mid to late 1980s – I can’t say as I never saw all the others – he was at times unbeatable. Ask John Barnes. Football Writers’ Player of the Year in 1984/5. 9

RB: Ian Snodin

This is a controversial choice but I’m still mad at Gary Stevens for the pass that let Ronnie Whelan in at the 1986 cup final. Snodin came from Leeds United as a midfielder and he was alright there, but when he filled in at right back for a spell he was superb. Fast, aggressive and smart, he made the position his own and was called up for England but had to withdraw when injury knackered him. 7

CB: Dave Watson

Wretched at first – a Guardian match report on one of his early games (probably by Ian Ross) reckoned he and Kevin Ratcliffe weren’t on first-name terms yet – he became one of Everton’s most important post-war players. Rock solid, rock hard and fond of unorthodox refuelling methods, Watson was superb. Lifted the FA Cup as captain in 1995 and once ruffled Michael Owen’s hair when the little swine was whining. 8

CB: Joleon Lescott

Most people my age would go for Kevin Ratcliffe here, and he was a good player and our most successful skipper, but Lescott was simply brilliant for us. His defection basically finished football for me. Good on the floor, good in the air, fast and with an incredible knack for scoring (big) goals, him leaving left a massive hole in my betting strategy. 8

LB: Pat Van den Hauwe

An absolute beast but a brilliant player. Once put Vince Hilaire over the advertising hoardings at Goodison with a spirited tackle. As Hilaire’s twitching torso was stretchered off people were whispering ‘I think he’s dead’. Also smashed through Jimmy ‘sh**house’ Case after he’d fouled Adrian Heath or Trevor Steven (can’t remember which) when playing for Southampton. Scored the goal which clinched the 1987 championship at Norwich City. 8

RM: Andrei Kanchelskis

My god what a player. Twenty goals in 52 league appearances in just under two seasons, including a cracking brace at Anfield in a 2-1 win in November 1995. He was fast as f**k with a great shot and a fine head too. At times Kancheskis was unstoppable – then he got the hump over a move to Fiorentina and that was that. 9

CM: Peter Reid

Described by Howard Kendall as Everton’s most important post-war signing. Paul Bracewell was arguably a better player but not as important. Reid wasn’t the quickest but he had everything else – he’d be priceless in today’s game. Although he’d get sent off a lot. Along with Kim Gordon and Jonny Marr, the only famous person I’d like to meet. Although we’d make an odd crowd. Marr would probably sneak off early having left his share of the bill but ‘forgetting’ the tip. 9

CM: Mikel Arteta

I was slow to warm to Arteta as I feel midfielders should be able to tackle, and it annoyedme off that he needed Lee Carsley in there to hold his hand at times. But the best little Spaniard was brilliant for Everton before he joined the sinking ship in London. Fit wife too. 9

LM: Kevin Sheedy

Sheer brilliance. I don’t know who Liverpool had on the left in 1982 when Sheedy joined us but he must have been brilliant. Sheedy wasn’t quick but he didn’t need to be because his touch, passing, crossing and shooting were so good. But it’s the free-kicks people remember, with many pointing to an FA Cup tie with Ipswich where he smashed it top corner, was told to retake, and smashed it in the other corner. Magic. 9

CF: Peter Beardsley

Along with Sheedy the most skilful Everton player I’ve ever seen. John Motson on Match of the Day when we played (I think) Coventry said: “You could take this first 30 minutes from Beardsley and put out a video called ‘how to play football’”. There’s no better sight than Beardsley shaking his hips, sending the defender the wrong way and then stroking the ball past a baffled keeper. 9

CF: Graeme Sharp

Everton’s post-war record goalscorer, Sharp scored some of the most important goals in the club’s most successful period, including the winner at Anfield in 1984/5, the first in the 1984 FA Cup final, and the equaliser in the home leg of the 1985 European Cup Winners’ Cup semi final against Bayern Munich. The Toffees went on to win 3-1 in a game regarded by many as Everton’s greatest ever. If you weren’t there you missed out because it was ace. 9

Gaffer: Howard Kendall.

Managed the best team of my lifetime, and won things to boot. 9

Total: 103

Result: QPR 102 - 103 Everton

The Everton legends edge this one, with only a single point in it. Looks like the quick wit of Andrei Kanchelskis and the skill of Geordie maestro Peter Beardsley were too much for the West London boys - however with QPR sitting just above the relegation zone and in dire need of points, it could be a completely different story today at Loftus Road.

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