Church Exempted From Gay Marriage? Oh Please Piss Off

It's 2012, the President of the USA backs gay marriage and our Government have moved to protect the Church. Pass the sick bag. And the rifle...
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“The Church of England will be forbidden by law from performing gay marriage ceremonies in an effort to appease senior Anglicans and Tory MPs.”

I don’t normally go in for acronyms, especially on the 8.04 from Tonbridge, but if I did I’d use WTF. This statement is not the opening line from some bastard hybrid of a Ben Elton book and a Chris Morris script, but the first paragraph of the front page lead of today’s Times. And there’s more.

“This exemption, designed to prevent legal challenges to churches that refuse to marry gay couples, represents a victory for the Church after it voted last month against allowing women to be bishops.”

That’s right. 2012. Women and Gays. You’re bad. Heretics. Evil. BURN.

Of course, the problem here isn’t necessarily the Church. Let’s face it, when you believe that you can feed 5000 with a stale loaf and a can of sardines that have been knocking about in the manger for 17 years alongside other myths and fables then you are clearly not worth bothering with.

The Government though, is a different matter. Call this sixth Form politics all you want (I never went though), but as I write millions of people are unemployed and have no fucking chance of getting a job, food banks have been set up to meet the demands of the increasing number of people who can’t eat and we are still, because of the policies put in place by the two-headed Bullingdon snake, in the middle of a second recession.

Before you burn my bleeding heart, I of course know that there are loads of people who don’t want jobs, who smoke and have Sky and accept food packages and the role the Labour Government played in the financial state of the country, but this is a bridge too far.


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Despite the archaic views of these senior Anglicans and Tory MPs, Britain is not an overtly religious country. Sure, there are a lot of people with faith, but its not like Italy or Spain where every cabbie has twelve crucifixes, three sets of rosary beads and a tattered picture of the prostitute Mary hanging from the rear-view mirror. And even if it was, it still wouldn’t matter.

The stupid thing is, this announcement came at the same time as the Government announced plans that should hopefully make same sex weddings possible by 2014. Great, why should it take two years though? And more importantly why deny two human beings in love the chance to get married in a church.

It’s highly likely that a large portion of same sex couples would prefer to be tarred and feathered than get married in the house of a God that essentially hates them, but what about the ones who just like the local church and want to get married in the same place their parents, grandparents, and friends have. They are denied a basic human right because a few doddering old fuck pigs don’t want to spill egg on their old school tie every time a Roger and a Trevor, a Cath and a Joan, get spliced in church.

And there it is. Would any court, on the basis of the evidence in front of them, be able to deny that this is a Human Rights issue? Of course not. Which is why it sickens me even more, organised religion that sees large swathes of the populace as essentially wrong and won’t let it’s own members be Bishops, is protected from having it’s knees hacked away at and exposed for the cabal of shithouses that it really is by a Government that, at they very heart of the matter, is in place to serve the best interests of the country and its people. Wankers.