There's a popular theory which says on average it takes 13 dates to find true love, so Norwich (not Shoreditch) bartender Tom Packer is putting it to the test by going on 13 different dates in pursuit of the girl of his dreams. Sounds pretty reasonable doesn't it? Oh, but he wants you to pay for it all.
That's right. The cardboard cut-out beard and tats mannequin doesn't have the money to pay for himself so he's crowdfunding the necessary dollar, £1300 be exact, so a string of lucky women can listen to him recite his poetry all night.
So far he's raised over £200. You can have a look at his fundraising page here, where he offers rewards for donations in the form of dates and poems.
Tell you what mate, here's a bar of soap and a ticket to Blackpool for the weekend, now go and get your leg over before you disappear up your own backside.