There’s a lot in the world of fashion to have a right old laugh at but last week in NYC, Tom Ford pulled off a feat so fly, so debonair that this geezer is officially the gay James Bond.
Sit back and imagine your personal list of the 32 most beautiful women in the world. Women of all ages who are beautiful, inspiring, interesting and sexy. Hhhmm....
Imagine choosing an outfit for each of these women who all break their schedules for free to gather at your place for five hours to meet, drink champagne and prepare for the night to begin. Lauren Hutton is relaxing in silk pyjamas. Supermodel Daria Werbovy is giggling with Julianne Moore as they practise walking in the highest heels. Beyoncé should probably have been at the MTV awards in LA (she won an award with Lady Gaga) but she chose to be here with you tonight because she’s your fan. You kneel to straighten the dress of Marisa Berenson, she laughs, savouring the moment.
Imagine that outside your building the world's press has gone into meltdown because their fashion editors did or didn’t receive one of the elusive 100 invitations to your event where no other celebrities, bloggers or photographers (except one, Terry Richardson) are permitted entry. Paparazzi flashbulbs light up the night and holding back the fray are your huge doormen in black tuxedos holding over-sized umbrellas.
The lights go down, everybody is seated.
Out walk the women one by one, each wearing an outfit that you designed, individually inspired by each of these wonderful females. You, holding a mic and wearing a sharp tux introduces each of them personally to the audience. “Ladies and Gentlemen, Miss Amber Valetta wears... Miss Emmanuelle Seigneur wears...” Lou Doillon wears a suit slashed to the navel and Karen Elson wears a slinky cocktail dress. "Ladies and gentleman, Miss Joan Smalls.....who I think just turned me straight," you say as the young elegant, black gazelle who's ruling the catwalks right now, glides past with a smile. When Beyoncé sashays and turns with a wink to show off her beautiful behind you quip, “and now I’m really straight.”
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