Little Conspiracies: Was Henry Winkler's Fonz a Drug Dealer?
Henry Winkler has just been awarded an OBE but was the Fonz in Happy Days actually a pusher man? Just think about it. Everyone loved him, he was always smiling AND he wears sunglasses inside...
The Evidence
1. His office was in a toilet.
2. He hung around with kids (mostly students) much younger than himself.
3. His mode of transport was a motorbike.
4. He wore a leather jacket - the known uniform of both Hell’s Angels and the Ramones who all knew a little something about drugs.
5. He lived above a garage which could quite easily be used to process and parcel his gear.
6. Every time he came into Albert’s all the kids went ‘Heeeeyyy’ with an unusually keen grin.
7. The programme’s theme tune suggested a seven-days-a-week feeling of euphoria.
8. Many of the kids in the hamburger joint wore cardigans or baseball jackets with their drug of choice displayed on the front of them in the form of giant letters. Some wore E, others C and one even boldy fronted a big H.
9. The action took place in a hang-out with a band - most bands take drugs.
10. The action took place in a hang-out with a kitchen, most short-order chefs take a little something to keep them awake.
11. Fonzie’s surname, Fonzarelli, was Italian-American. Have you never seen Goodfellas?
12. Stick the word ‘mon’, a phrase often used by Jamaican drug dealers (see The Harder They Come) and Scottish smack addicts (Trainspotting) into the title of Fonzie’s show and you have Happy Mondays - what further proof do you need?
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COMMENTS
And Albert the owner of the hamburger joint appeared to have a nasal problem, sniff sniff, mirrors and razorblades anyone ?
I always thought Ralph Malph was a bit of a degenerate.
And he always had the coke s&uts hanging off him.
He had dirty sluts all over him like a bad rash.
Pottsie - stick on stoner Richie's mum - surely full of Valium
the funniest thing I've read for a long time. That mightbe because I'm stoned though. ;-)
might not have been the drugs, he was man in his thirties who seemed to spend a lot of time getting off with high school girls......
Arnold's, not Albert's.
I think it was both wasn't it Russell? One then the other, or was it two Arnolds? If I'm wrong I stand corrected with my thumbs out and a spliff to pass your way in the fist.
Let's not forget that he once jumped over a lone Shark, too. DEFFO DEALER.
Was there ever an Albert's? I'm not going to spend all day on this for the sake of an imaginary spliff. But "Arnold's Happy Days" Googles well, "Albert's Happy Days" doesn't.
Brilliant stuff. Point 12 is a stroke of genius even if "mon" is a word and not a phrase. Bringing The Fonz back as an elderly drug fiend (pace Breaking Bad) wouldn't be a bad idea.
Arnold's was the diner, Al was the 2nd proprietor, taking over from Arnold himself. Oh, and Arnold was Japanese.
Genius. Nobody likes the truth, but there it is! Point 12, though, "The Harder They Come" surely?
corrected cheers
I actually had this theory many years ago, fonzie struck me as slightly odd and being a dealer was my only explanation
very very funny article:))
Jump the shark episode makes a LOT more sense if it was concieved as a really bad acid trip.