Stars Wars Episode VII: Hey Internet, Chill Out For A Moment - Sabotage Times
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Stars Wars Episode VII: Hey Internet, Chill Out For A Moment

Last night, Walt Disney Company agreed to acquire Lucasfilm and is planning Star Wars Episode VII for 2015. Needless to say, a storm of nerd rage to rival Sandy hit the internet. But here's why I think we should all just chill out; Episode 7 could be a good thing.
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Last night, Walt Disney Company agreed to acquire Lucasfilm and is planning Star Wars Episode VII for 2015. Needless to say, a storm of nerd rage to rival Sandy hit the internet. But here's why I think we should all just chill out; Episode 7 could be a good thing.

It's been mooted for years and now the fated Star Wars Episodes VII-IX are coming. Last night as I prepared for an early night,  the internet exploded (well the parts I frequent did, there was also an incredible Arsenal game going on as well) with news that Disney have agreed to buy Lucasfilm and plan to make Star Wars Episode VII for 2015. My Facebook and Twitter feeds became inundated with messages of shock, anger and disgust at the news from fans."No! Just No!" read one status, "Childhood ruined" read a tweet and perhaps my personal favourite; "Oh....f**k off Disney with you're [sic] bullsh*t."

Now I love Star Wars. One of my favourite things to do is get really drunk with some of my closest friends and discuss how to “fix” the two trilogies. (More Darth Maul, Wookies and Coruscant. Throw in the concept of battle meditation for the assault on the 2nd Death Star ) So when I heard the news of Episode VII, my reaction was a “Hmm... interesting.” For fans of a franchise, we Star Wars fans get awfully pissy when an announcement is made giving us more of our beloved universe.

Think of this more as “The house that has contacts with Joss Whedon and owns Pixar is now at the helm of a new Star Wars trilogy."

Yes. I know. The prequels burned you. We must never forget how much of a monumental spunking of potential they were. The prequels manage as films to simultaneously both suck and blow (except Episode III, I think that kind of stands up). Terrible dialogue, wooden acting, an unnecessary explanation for The Force that destroys the series’ mysticism (seriously, the word midichlorians is banned in my household) and that... thing Jar Jar Binks. I'm going off on a tangent here in a ham fisted attempt to make you laugh. The point here that I should be making is that, if anything Episode VII won't be another Phantom Menace from sheer fear of what we might do. Disney has shown with its handling of the Avengers and other entries of the Marvel Cinematic Universe how it can treat a franchise with care and consideration while still producing a quality movie, and there's no reason they cannot do it  again.  Disney have shown a willingness to bring in creatives both outside the box of typical Hollywood directors (see Kenneth Branagh directing Thor) as well as those who will treat their intellectual properties with care and respect.

Rather than think of this as “They are making new Star Wars films? Oh God, remember what happened last time they did that?”  Think of this more as “The house that has contacts with Joss Whedon and owns Pixar is now at the helm of a new Star Wars trilogy.” Heck, just think of this as “Star Wars, without that bearded Jabba lookalike (AKA George Lucas) potentially mucking things up”

I love Star Wars. One of my favourite things to do is get really drunk with some of my closest friends and discuss how to “fix” the two trilogies.

The Expanded Star Wars Universe is a unique example of collaborative scale. No other fictitious universe has so many different people contributing to canon storyline, be it in comics, TV shows, games or books. Some of the best Star Wars tales we have are not those on offer in the six films we currently have.  There is a such a wealth of potential source material Disney can draw from to make this new trilogy. A little Thrawn trilogy here, some Darth Revan there; so much of the best Star Wars elements can we mixed together for a potential Episode VII. I joke about giving it to Chris Nolan and have him set a gritty reboot on Coruscant where every character is Boba Fett. There is so much to play around with here.

With zero plot details, director or writer attached, isn’t it best we wait a little bit before we cry about our childhood being non-consensually fornicated with?

Heck, just think of this as “Star Wars, without that bearded Jabba lookalike (AKA George Lucas) potentially mucking things up”

What I’m trying to say is, Star Wars Episode VII being announced is not as bad as finding out your father is a 6ft 7 leather wearing galaxy ruling megalomaniac with an asthma problem. Or that you made out with your sister. Disney making another Star Wars film has the potential to be brilliant, and if it’s not, just do what I do when a terrible reboot or sequel gets announced – don’t watch it. It’s existence won't mean the other good films cease to be.   I once bought my brother the Indiana Jones quadrilogy and took out Kingdom of the Crystal Skull before I gave it to him as a Christmas present.

Be positive. Remember fans, fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering...or at the least, an overreaction.

UPDATE 31/10/12 -  After posting this Carl Anka featured on BBC World Service to discuss the possible ramifications further, you can find the audio of the debate here, skip to 33 minutes.

Special thanks to Michael Hardy 

You can follow Carl Anka on Twitter @Bubblegum616

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