The Orgasm Alarm Clock
“The Little Rooster Alarm Clock curves comfortably around your pubic mound, inside your knickers but outside your body, and the vibrating leg rests between your legs.” Quite…
5 Things Every Commuter Fears
Like it or lump it, the daily commute is as necessary a part of the working ritual as photocopying your arse at the staff party. That said though, there are a few things in particular that will send a shiver down the spine of even the most hardened straphanger.
Show Me How: If QVC Did Sex Guides…
If QVC did sex guides they’d me much like the new very online phenomenon Show Me How which for £2.00 will tell you precisely how to have it off standing up without falling over.
5 Things I Swore I’d Never Do When I Became A Parent
I was adamant, adamant that I wouldn’t be on of THOSE parents. How wrong I was…
Ethel and Ernest: The Most Heartwarming Graphic Novel You’ll Read
With graphic novels full of murder and death, Brigg’s contribution is a pleasant escape.
From Liberia to Libya, Tim Hetherington Set the Bar of Photojournalism
How the late Tim Hetherington made me look at photography in a new light and raised the bar for photojournalists everywhere…
How Breaking Up For Greener Grass Made Me a Criminal
Breaking up may seem like the best thing to do, but how do you cope when your ex crops up looking thinner, happier and more successful than you?
You’re Not A Wacky ‘Character’. You’re A Twat
Everybody knows at least one. Be it the bloke who vomits out of the taxi window, or the girl who apparently made ‘that video’.
10 Great Stories For Children Under 7
If your children are anything like mine, they’re happiest when they’re curled up listening to your repertoire of silly voices. Here are some of our favourite stories for laughs, questions and hopefully, sleep.
Merry Sodding Christmas
To me, Christmas is a big pile of knackers that over-promises and under-delivers. So spare a though for me when you and Aunt Clarice are bonding over the port.
Why Office Parties Are Shit
Drink copious amounts of alcohol just to bear the pointless smalltalk, and spend a night in the company of people you hate. Office parties can get to fuck…
The Voice: Semi-Final Contestants Reviewed
A Damian Rice rap, more Elvis Presley references from Tom Jones and Evil Toni. It’s semi-final week on The Voice…
Sex, Lies and Rinsing Guys: The Cold, Dead Eyes of a Shark
A new series began on C4 last night following the tactics of three golddiggers as they manipulate horny and very wealthy men relieving them of their cash and nothing else…
The Voice: X Factor Without the Best Bits
There’s no embarrassing audition processes to watch on this show, only Tom Jones making his comeback as a tanned Orvil from the valleys.
Masterchef 2012, Day Three: Like Watching Big Ted Drown In A Pool Of Acid
Panic stations hit overdrive as Masterchef thunders onwards. Can the contestants survive such fierce, crippling expectations?
My Daughter The Teenage Nudist: Be Happy, Get Naked, Don’t Ram It Down My Throat
I admire nudists. I spend hours wrestling a swimming costume on under a sarong and then wear it on top. So good on you, Mollie, just stop the preaching…
Desperate Scousewives: TOWIE Without The Heart
Where as TOWIE had a heart beneath its trashy veneer, only a mother could care about a woman who takes four hours to get ready to go shopping.
X Factor Results, Week 15: Dull As A Sloth Eating Graph Paper
Olly gets upstaged by The Muppets, Kelly breaks down and someone seems to have swapped Tulisa for a Russian escort…
X Factor 2011, Judges Houses: Bring Out The Gimps
There was an elephant in the room (steady on -Ed) in the shape of Beyonce and Louis could barely hide his contempt at being lumbered with Sinitta. And as for Robbie, he just can’t help himself, can he?
The X Factor 2011, Week One: Dig The New Breed
They’re back! Sort of. Gary Barlow seems to be trying too hard to emulate Cowell, Louis is as annoying as ever and Tulisa is much better than Cheryl…
Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance
As a parent with a two-year old who thinks she’s a mix of Mike Tyson and Buce Lee, I’ve got a vested interest in this programme. But will it help?
Embarrassing Bodies; Another Wonky Week.
This week, our intrepid quacks get stuck into a bendy cock, an escaping brain and a mammary representation of Homer Simpson’s face.
Embarrassing Bodies: The Good, The Bad and The Incontinent
‘There’s no shame, we’re all the same’ says the blurb for Channel 4′s Embarrassing Bodies. Well I don’t know about you, but I don’t have knockers like Spaniel’s Ears…
The Apprentice 2010: The Final
Chris v Stella in a boozy battle to win over Lord sugar. Cue triangular bottles, bad colouring, rubbish adverts and Joanna re-branding the colour blue as ‘gay’. And where the hell was Baggs the brand?
Apprentice 2010: Week 11 - The Interviews
It was the episode we had all been waiting for, when Lord Sugar’s henchmen got to interrogate the fools and Baggs the Brand finally got his comeuppance. Sweet.