The Women We All Secretly Fancy, Part 5

From ancient reality stars to computer game characters, our ever popular series is back...
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Janine off Eastenders


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She's the Albert Square bad girl who shagged BARRY, but don't hold that against her. Newly-departed soap sizzler Janine Butcher is a bit of East End rough who'd knowingly flog you a stolen car but then happily let you drive her out to Southend seafront and do the business up against a disused cockle shed. Basically, our kind of girl.

Carol Wright

Yes, she might've spawned TOWIE's orange glowing mega-twat Mark Wright, but there's something about Cazza that we can't resist.

The blonde reality MILF must surely be the fittest 50-something in Essex - but having just renewed her vows with Mark's dad, erm, Mark, we don't reckon there's much chance of a romantic date in Lakeside on the horizon.

Mary Berry

She might be about 403 years old, but the Great British Bake-Off host has been making us rise quickly and evenly ever since she hit our screens back in 1849.

Chun Li


What self-serving '90s kid's eyes didn't immediately revert to the split in Chun Li's skirt while playing Street Fighter II? The element of danger was also a big draw - Mandarin Chinese is a difficult language to chat somebody up in because it's all about tones and inflections. You might want to compliment somebody's eyes but end up calling their mum a cunt, and if you got on the wrong side of Chun Li she'd serve you up a Spinning Bird Kick no drama.

Sian Welby

You're probably asking yourself how the obviously attractive TV presenter has made it into the 'Women We All Secretly Fancy' list. Truth is, one of our in-house writers is actually going out with her, which means it's quite awkward when we mention it publicly. Sooo......


The Women We All Secretly Fancy, Part 4

The Women We All Secretly Fancy, Part 3

The Women We All Secretly Fancy, Part 2